To the one who feels the need to ALWAYS be strong - *a love letter to you*
sometimes being strong is all we know.
but what happens when the load gets too much to bare and we feel like we are on the brink of losing it. well if you’re anything like me; you take on more to distract yourself from realizing that you’re about to lose control. because you can’t lose control, if all hell breaks loose then it’s on you right? everyone expects you to be strong, especially as a female...it’s like the whole world expects us to just take shit and bounce back immediately from it and move on.
this is a love letter,
a kind of “if you’ve been waiting for a sign this is it” moment
to those people —
the ones who feel the need to ask permission to be able to finally feel what they feel, process it, and heal from it.
it’s okay to be vulnerable.
you can stop pretending like you have all the answers and your whole life figured out.
— THIS ONE IS FOR YOU —
to the mom
who is on the verge tears while sitting in front of the pile of laundry that’s been growing height for the last week and a half, with the kids screaming for the same toy for the 100th time even though they have their own. you can’t to catch a break, a breathe, or a moment to yourself. things keep piling up and yet day in and day out you are the strength for those around you. know, that you are doing an incredible job being the back bone of your home. without you nothing functions, nothing makes sense, and no one would survive. give yourself the credit you deserve, fuck the dishes, let the laundry sit for one more day. you deserve that second glass of wine, a night binge of netflix and a bubble bath.
to the one working multiple
jobs trying to survive without drowning in bills again, stressing over which ones to pay first, and hoping that maybe, just maybe this time something will be different. i need you to take a step back, breathe in really deep, and scream. let it all out, the frustration you feel, the countless hours of missing sleep because anxiety keeps your mind up all night worrying about the million ‘what ifs’ that could happen. take a moment to appreciate your determination and tenacity to never give up. what you are going through is only temporary, stay focused on the end result, i believe in you.
to the one tip toeing the edge of
a massive career or life change, TAKE THAT DAMN LEAP. jump in head first, fail, get up, try again, fail some more, learn and keep fucking pushing. ignore the ones who try and keep you stagnant because of their own fears and insecurities of pursuing their dreams. their issues have nothing to do with you. like no shit Tom, of course i could fall on my face and this might not work out BUT why wake up every single day miserable, to go do something you aren’t truly passionate about? the stability will come. you’ve thought about this way too long, created plans, made the spreadsheets, this is what you HAVE TO GO AFTER. so do it now, whatever decision you made go with it...you’ll eventually be angry that you didn’t make the transition soon.
to the one who just had their entire world ripped apart,
and flipped upside down by the one who was supposed to be forever. i know without a doubt in my heart how badly this hurts you, how betrayed you must feel and how angry you are at the fact that you gave your all for so long, just to have them make it seem like it was so easy to walk away from the life you built together. and it’s going to suck for a while, maybe even a long time...but just know that you, now i need you to pay close attention to this part that i’m about to say...YOU ARE NOT BROKEN. you are whole, and complete, and worthy of your happiness. because YOU deserve it, and damnit you OWE IT to yourself to fill your heart with love and light and all the amazing things that give you butterflies, spark life, and fill you with joy. so forgive yourself for doubting how special you are, and questioning your worth — because in this moment you get to redefine what your meaning of love is...for yourself, for others, and for the simple fact that you can and you WILL make it through this.
to the one who has no idea what their life holds for them next,
it doesn’t matter how old you are — it’s okay, you wanna know a secret, no one knows whats next. you can only attempt to plan and follow your journey. especially the younger one coming straight out of high school or just graduating college, at this age how are you supposed to know what to do with the rest of your life? i mean sure, you can take the route that your parents had laid out for you. but if that’s their dream and not yours then why put effort day in and day out to catering to someone else’s expectations when you could be discovering yourself. finding out what makes you happy and following that path. stop putting so much pressure on your future, so what if you cant figure out that next step, or if you haven’t landed your dream job. there are thousands of people who still have no idea what they want to do in life in their prime adult years. shit, i changed my major 6 times in college. i went from wanting to a kindergarten teacher, to working in supply, to getting a different degree in marketing, and two years ago i walked into a coffee shop and felt a sense of peace and happiness that overwhelmed my entire being and decided at that moment that all i wanted to do was write and open up a coffee shop — i was 26 years old when i decided to follow that path because my passion finally aligned with my purpose. it’s okay to not know, as long as you try, and pursue what brings you joy in the moment, you wont ever feel like you aren’t amounting to much. if you change your mind then so what, you’re allowed to do that, allowed to grow, allowed to fuck up, make mistakes, fall, cry, scream, im proud of you, keep pushing because you’re going to make mistakes and that’s alright.
to all of us,
yes we are strong, but we are also human. we try, we fail, we let words and others action get to us more than they should. our strength is embedded in each and every single one of us. just because we need to take a moment to let our guard down and break down, that doesn’t mean we are any less than. so take time to think about what you want out of life, what makes you happy, what sparks you with joy, what makes you...YOU.
feel what you need to feel and then pick yourself back up.
maybe you resonated with a portion of this, or maybe you found pieces of yourself in all of this. i just want you to know that you have way more power than you give yourself credit for. don’t ever forget that.
— EVER.